Society > Tunisian Friendship 101 / Amities Tunisiennes

Friendship, TN way, has changed dramatically the past 15years or more. Before I used to have friends that I can really talk to and spend quality time with, without the need to worry about the after talk. It was simple and straightforward concept of friendship, there were no strings attached, trust and respect was high and mentalities were not twisted.

Nowadays…..it’s a totally different business, actually it is a business.

Story 1: (Hot from the oven)

Yesterday, a friend of mine called from Tunis over Skype. I was surprised he knew my nickname, but it turned out he’s a friend of an old friend that I’m constantly in touch with

Mr X started talking about his life, the good old days & the fun compared to the misery of today’s Tunisia. He went on detailing his struggle to make ends meet, talked about his brand new car, the ‘Portable’, the babes, the long nights and the debts.

I felt good that some old timer remembered and bothered to call me (well, it’s free, but c’est le geste qui compte).

The conversation was quite flat; mostly talking about the past, and the present in the abstract, touching on the weather from time to time.

Mr X was about to hang up when he suddenly brings the subject of electronics and mentions how expensive they are in Tunisia, and even in Europe due to the currency exchange. He then jumped talking about E-bay (pronounced E-BYE in Tunisia), then went ballistic against the prestigious organization because his account does not work anymore (I understood it was suspended).

I could not figure what this talk was about exactly, but I kept listening.

He then jumps to discuss his work, how demanding it is, how hectic the travel was and how he’s constantly on the road, managing deliveries and time (btw, I don’t know what he does exactly, but who cares).

Then he starts asking me about this gadget called XDA sort of Palm Pilot sort of PDA, sort of Mini computer, sort of GPS, sort of Mobile phone, sort of Radar Detector, sort of everything.

I replied ‘No’, I’m not really aware of such device, i’m quite basic person.

He then tries to convince me to buy it for myself, he kept venting the benefits it would have on my life, both personal and professional and how better off I would be, especially in-front of my colleagues.

I kindly told him that I don’t need these things and that they’re quite expensive anyway and over my modest budget (Napo does not buy anything above 200$ when it comes to gadgets)

Finally, he gets real and moves to the point, and asks me if I can buy one for him (1500 US) and bring it with me when I go home on my next vacation.

I replied: Sure, well, I mean, you’re going to pay for it or you want it as a gift?

He replied: Of course I’ll pay you my brother, you’ll have your money waiting for you in cash

I asked: Ok, granted I buy it and bring it with me, what if customs (Diwana) put a hold on it, after all Radar detector & GPS are prohibited in Tunisia.

He replied: I don’t think so, you’re “bouha”, you can bring even a car and no body will notice it. I remember you buddy, you were the smartest ass around

I asked: Ok, thank you for the compliment, but still, what if customs put a hold on it?

He replied: Well, you pay and then we’ll talk, I have many friends at customs, I’ll get your money back

I asked: We talk what and when?

He replied: When time comes.

I kept silent for a minute then I told him that I have a better idea: Why don’t you order it yourself? If you have an E-bay account then you must have a credit card, and if you have a credit card, you can buy it anywhere in the world and get the item shipped to TN.

He replied: It’s too complicated and I don’t know how to do it, besides Customs will definitely charge me 150% and I don’t have the money to pay for it

I then replied: I will help complete the transaction, don’t worry.

He said: it’s ok, don’t worry about it, Aya good night, it’s really late here and tomorrow I have long day at work.

And the line goes silent…before I even say “Nighty Nite”

Story 2 (A year or so ago)

This is a Tunisian in Montreal that I knew when I was a student, last seen or heard of was 7years ago.

Phone rings ***

Napo: Hello

Mr. Y: Bouha Napo, how you doing my brother?

Napo: Hamdullah and you, who’s speaking?

Mr. Y: It’s me, chnouwa you don’t remember people anymore? I’m Mr Y, oh man, I’m disappointed in you!!!

Napo: Yes, Yes, How are you doing my friend? Long time no hear. How have you been? did you find a job after graduation?

Mr. Y: Yes, I’m a director a local tech firm now, lots of money and lots of fun, life is good.

Napo: Wow, impressive. Aya Hamdullah, inshallah it stays like that all the time.

Mr. Y: So, how come you don’t visit me? I missed you a lot; you should come over from Toronto, and enjoy some fun here. We have lots of babes.

Napo: Oh, I’m no longer into drinking & flirting, I’m settled now.

Mr. Y: Ah, aya mabrouk..

Napo: Thank you dear, inshallah likewise.

Mr. Y: I was married, then divorced and I have one kid in France.

Napo: Really? Oh, and a kid too? Why France? Oh well, Sure?! (I didn’t know what to say)

Mr. Y: Look Napo, You’re my man tonight. I have a small thing to ask you, and I could not find a reliable true man among the many friends I have here. They’re all Junk but you’re the best pick because you were and still are my best friend.

Napo: Glad to help. Inshallah Khyr.

Mr. Y: Actually, I need your mailing address.

Napo: Sure, you’re coming for a visit, when? Aya marhbé.

Mr. Y: Not really, I need it for some paper work.

Napo: Paper work? You mean to send me postage?

Mr. Y: No (idiot) I need your address so I can use it to file my income tax in Ontario so I pay less tax. I also need it because I have a female friend in Tunisia who I may marry but I want her to visit first so I can check her out, and she needs a ‘Certificat d’hebergement’ for a visitor’s visa.

Napo: Oh, that’s risky business man. First, for the income tax, you don’t want to do that, because that’s fraud and you don’t want to hurt me right?

Mr. Y: Don’t worry, it’s all good, I’ll take care of it

Napo: No you won’t, please forget about it.

Mr. Y: Ok, no problem. I think you’re quite paranoid. I just thought you would be brave with me, but looks like friendship these days is no longer like before. Ok, what about the certificate?

Napo: Sure, I can help write one for you. But wait, why do u need my mailing address? Can’t you use yours?

Mr. Y: I can’t, because I don’t have a job now.

Napo: How can you bring a girl and have no money? What about her family?

Mr. Y: Oh, things have changed now. Tunisian girls are very easy, and they look forward to any opportunity to leave the country or even married man, as long as there is money. Tthere are hundreds of them, you just have to go to the right places to find them.

Napo: humm, ok, that’s news to me but not surprising after all what i read, hear and see. However, didn’t you say you’re a director at a local tech firm?

Mr. Y: Well, I was, but I decided to leave and look for a better job (he means, he was fired, this is if he truly was a director)

Napo: Ok, granted you have my address, you still need my signature right?

Mr. Y: Don’t worry about that, I’ll take care of it, that’s none of your business.

Napo: Wow, how so? You’re going to send it without signature?

Mr. Y: Yes and No, but don’t worry now.

Napo goes silent, humm, ok, this guy is nuts, but I need to keep him cool and play by his rules.

Napo: Here it is, 12345 Rue St-Y, Montreal, Quebec, Canada.

Mr. Y: But that’s not your address? You’re not in Montreal. Com’on now.

Napo: Right, I’m moving there in a month.

Mr. Y: But that’s right where I live now. How come, you’re moving here? I thought you’re staying in Ontario, I need you in Ontario.

Napo: Sorry man, I have found a better position in Montreal and now I’m looking forward to meeting you more often.

Mr. Y: Sure, ok, Aya marhbé and call me when you’re here, good night. Actually do you have a friend - does not matter if Tunisian or not - that lives in Ontario?.

Napo: Yes I do, but he’s on a visitor visa.

Mr. Y: No, that does not help, Good night.

Napo: Bye